Abbotsford hospital wedding allows dying mother to witness daughter’s marriage

Thanks to the quick work of some supportive nurses, a room at Abbotsford Regional Hospital was temporarily turned into a wedding chapel so a dying mother could watch her only child get married.

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ABBOTSFORD (NEWS 1130) — Thanks to the quick work of some supportive nurses, a room at Abbotsford Regional Hospital was temporarily turned into a wedding chapel so a dying mother could watch her only child get married.

Lights were hung, paper flowers were crafted, an aisle was strewn with petals, bouquets of white roses were gathered and a justice of the peace was procured — all within hours of Robin Sanford deciding she wanted to marry her fiance while her mom watched from a hospital bed.

Robin says the idea came during a visit on June 16. Her mother Nadine was diagnosed with breast cancer about a month before that, but her condition quickly became critical after her first chemotherapy treatment.

“We were sitting beside her bed, just talking to her. In hindsight, it sounds kind of crazy, but just in the moment, it felt right to have our wedding like that,” Robin explains.

“The four of us — me and my fiance, and my parents — we just decided that we wanted to do that. The nurses were amazing. They brought everything together for us. Literally, all we did was go get our marriage licence and some clothes and when we came back, everything was ready for us — an aisle, and flowers, and music, and everything.”

Sixteen hours after the couple exchanged their vows, Nadine passed away at age 58 — in the same hospital room where the ceremony was held.

During the ceremony itself, Robin had moments of joy, and moments of deep sorrow.

“We knew that she was sick and had cancer, but nobody expected it to go from diagnosis to passing away within six weeks. It was sad but also shocking,” Robin says.

“My mother was very sick and dying but also we were happy because I had just gotten married, it was a lot. It was quite confusing. There were moments where I was just smiling uncontrollably — so happy. Then a few minutes later I’d be crying. It was kind of all over the place.”

Still, Sanford is grateful her mother got to witness her wedding, adding her mom was awake and alert throughout the wedding, so much so that she was able to smile and make jokes. The pair were always close. The dress Sanford ended up wearing was one they had picked out together, although it was on a shopping trip when Sanford, who is now 24,  was a teenager.

“Me and her always did everything together. I’m an only child, so I got all the attention,” Robin explains.

The generosity of the nurses is another memory Sanford will cherish.

“For the ceremony, it was a completely private room that they got for us, for our family and my mother — flowers, music, lights. There were three nurses holding all of our phones so I have hundreds of pictures and videos from it,” she says.

“I am extremely, extremely grateful that the nurses were able to do this for us. We had told them what we had wanted to do, and within a few minutes, there was already several nurses making phone calls and finding people to make this happen for us. My biggest takeaway is that, even though it was tragic because my mother passed away from something so suddenly, I learned that there is a lot of good people in the world. I am super grateful that they were able to do this for us so fast.”

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